


don’t tell anybody, ever

by fiveyaaas



Series: under mistletoe [18]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Christmas Presents, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, this is probably the fluffiest fic of them as adults that i have ever made
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:22:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28403952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fiveyaaas/pseuds/fiveyaaas
Summary: ““Okay, I’m about to tell you something, and I need you to never mention it to another soul, ever. For as long as you live.”Her brows knit together, “What is it?” The worried look in his eyes made him feel a little guilty, but it was vital that nobody know of this. “Five, what do you have to-”“Promise that you will tell nobody,” he interrupted loudly.”
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy/Vanya Hargreeves
Series: under mistletoe [18]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2036878
Comments: 1
Kudos: 49
Collections: Harcest Ficmas 2020





	don’t tell anybody, ever

**Author's Note:**

  * For [y2fandom](https://archiveofourown.org/users/y2fandom/gifts).



> I just remembered that my user subscribers are about to be spammed... sorry, guys LMAO.

Five watched Vanya distressedly, not that she was paying attention to him at all. Each time she put the scissors in her mouth to hold them while she worked, he had to resist the urge to lecture her on all the ways one could get hurt with scissors, which he was aware she  _ probably _ already knew. Still,  _ somebody  _ had to tell her that she was going to hurt herself, and he was willing to make that sacrifice.

“Why do you insist on wrapping those things?” Five asked, whimpering when she bent down and the blade went near her eye. She glanced up, frowning at him in confusion. “Could you at the very least set those damn scissors down?”

“Oh,” she mumbled with a bright blush, sheepishly laying them down and allowing Five’s blood pressure to drop considerably. “I’m just not sure how to wrap a present well enough that it doesn’t look like a child did it.”

“And your solution was to hurt yourself?”

She rolled her eyes, apparently losing all of the embarrassment from before. “I wasn’t about to hurt myself. There just wasn’t enough room in my hands when I was holding both the tape and the paper, and I had to improvise.”

Five sighed, loudly, scowling skyward in hopes that it would make the little girl (that Klaus swore up and down to be God) answer for Her sins. Of course, if She tried to come down to him, he’d try to beat Her ass for all She had done. “You  _ are  _ aware that tables exist for a reason, right?”

“It’s not a big deal, you’re being dramatic.”

He gaped at his fiancee, horrified that she would suggest such a thing when she was tempting the fates with her current wrapping tomfoolery. _ “I’m _ not being dramatic;  _ you’re _ being reckless.”

“You have gotten shot and neglected to mention it to anybody before you passed out before.”

“What’s your point?”

She huffed out a sigh, “My point is that all I’m doing is wrapping a gift, and I need it done before tomorrow and you’re being a pain in the ass.”

“How am I-” At the significant look she gave him, he decided to relent. “Okay, I’m about to tell you something, and I need you to never mention it to another soul, ever. For as long as you live.”

Her brows knit together, “What is it?” The worried look in his eyes made him feel a little guilty, but it was vital that nobody know of this. “Five, what do you have to-”

“Promise that you will tell  _ nobody,”  _ he interrupted loudly. 

“Alright, yeah, fine, I promise. Are you okay?”

“Yes, I’m fine,” he said impatiently, blinking over to her and settling down beside the wrapping paper. “It is only because I love you dearly that I am letting you know that I can do this.”

When he started measuring out how much paper to use, avoiding her gaze, she snapped, “You mean to tell me you watched me wrap presents  _ horribly  _ for  _ years?” _

“That sounds like a you prob-” The paper glowed a little as her eyes lit up. “Alright,  _ fine.  _ I’m sorry. Jeez. Don’t cause the end of the world because I was being-”

“A bitch?”

He frowned, “I would use a different word, but, sure, I suppose.”

Five set the present inside, wondering why she hadn’t just slapped a bow on the box, considering it gave no indication as to what it contained. 

“Can you teach me how to do this?”

“You want me to teach you how to wrap presents?’

“Well, yeah, teach a man to fish and all that.”

He explained his process, wondering how he’d gone from being a decorated assassin to… whatever this was. Five didn’t precisely mind the display of domesticity, but it was a little  _ jarring  _ when something like this became a day to day problem. “Okay, so there’s a trick with making ribbons curl,  _ don’t look at me like that.”  _ She had a large, dopey grin that she was giving him, likely enjoying the leverage she had on him. “Just put the ribbon  _ here,  _ against the edge of the scissors… drag it like so, making sure to get all of the ribbon in one swoop.” 

When he handed her the perfect curlicue, she set it down, leaning in to kiss him. Just as affected as the first time he’d ever kissed her, tilting his head to better slot their lips together. She smiled against his skin. As she parted from him, he made a small, discontented noise. 

“What was that for?” Five asked, moving his attention back to the present and trying to hide his smile. He probably wasn’t that successful at the endeavor, considering how hard it was to contain any tenderness he felt towards her, ever. 

“It’s really nice to see you in… a relatively ordinary setting. I know that I’m  _ not  _ ordinary now, but… I dunno, it’s just nice to know you would have fit in with me if I was.”

He kissed her again, a small peck to her nose. “You’ve never been anything less than extraordinary, but I am happy to live a simple, quiet life now. Especially one spent with you. We both deserve it.”

She didn’t even try to hide her smile, and a sense of levity washed over him, breathtaking in its reassurance. He grabbed a piece of tape to set the ribbon on top, imagining what the years to come would look like for them. Five had never expected that this would be what would become of his life, but he was content in the calmness of it. When they were younger, not yet separated even, he couldn’t have possibly imagined this, either. There had been a scarcity of anything  _ positive  _ within their lives, so he’d never even know what a life like this  _ would  _ look like.

A sense of bewilderment filled him at the realization that their life could be this way forever, and he didn’t try to hide his grin any longer, either. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading💕


End file.
